problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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