I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
