He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
