Say something about gay babies.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Randomize
