If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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