i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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