My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
