does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
