Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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