Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Randomize
