all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
