my sisters under your porch take her home
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Randomize
