whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
