Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
im drinking this country out of the recession.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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