You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize