Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
