I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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