Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
