meet me or not, i'm out of control
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
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