Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
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