Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
