She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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