It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
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