im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
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