Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
