Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
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