Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Its about making memories worth repressing
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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