does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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