So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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