He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Randomize
