We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
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