508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
can u get pink eye on your cock?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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