the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
