Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize