Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
