Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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