problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
