Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
