FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize