I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize