we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Thank you for not boning my boss.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
