I will die if light touches me.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
