Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Randomize