I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Randomize
