he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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