That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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