I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
