so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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