Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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