The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize